Some of the first advice given to those looking to advance their careers is “Find a mentor!” Usually given by someone who could just offer to be one themselves (but don’t). How do you establish one? What makes for a successful mentoring relationship?
Ask!
Take initiative! Overcome fear!
The biggest barrier to finding a mentor just may be you. Lack of self confidence or fear of rejection cause many who want a mentor to fail to just ask. Mentors don’t typically offer their time. Yet plenty have (or can make) time to give. Don’t anticipate their rejection in your mind. You only need to ask.
In fact, most potential mentors will gladly sit down to discuss things and determine if there is a fit. Even if they don’t ultimately agree to mentor, many will recommend others or provide other situational advice.
So, be bold and ask!
It’s got to be natural
In my experience, the relationship must be natural and easy to maintain. While people have found mentors through corporate mentor matching boards I have found those connections are not sustained long term. That’s not to say long term mentor relationships are the only successful ones. The matching board may lead to a long term relationship but its success is in overcoming the barrier of asking. It does not guarantee “fit”.
How do I choose?
A mentor with my personality or the opposite?
A leader whose job I want or their peer?
Some in my area of expertise or not?
The answer to any of those questions is “Both!” Now I understand you’re looking for a mentor and my response is to find more than one. We’ll explore this in more detail in a future post but it boils down to being able to obtain multiple perspectives to be able to make an informed decision.
Where to start? Wherever you are most comfortable. Someone of a similar style or personality or someone in your area of expertise is typically the most appropriate and also allows you to best engage in career discussions.
Mentorship is personal. Put yourself out there and good luck!